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Thread: Joke of the day

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Lake Village, AR
    Posts
    428

    Default Joke of the day

    Since the season is winding down I thought it would be time to start the Joke of the day thread again to give everyone a smile till it's time to start hitting the lake again.



    Boudreaux's BP Job:

    Down in Lafourche Parish , Louisiana , Boudreaux gets a job with BP helping with
    the cleanup. He reports for work and is told to speak to a supervisor about his
    assignment.

    He finds the man and asks, "Okay boss, what it is you want me to do"?
    The supervisor tells him to go to the animal shelter and clean the
    pelicans.
    Two hours later, Boudreaux comes back to the supervisor and says, "Okay, dey
    all cleaned. You want me to cook some rice ?
    07 Mobius LS--Razorback Red

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Lake Houston
    Posts
    656

    Default

    And the dialect is 100% spot on becuse they cant pronounce the letter "R".
    2013 LSV
    2005 LSV - SOLD

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Belton, SC
    Posts
    941

    Default

    lol! Good joke.
    '00 Moomba Kamberra
    '06 Yamaha FZ1 & 6 dirtbikes for me & my kids
    '99 BMW 528it
    '06 Chevy Express 3500 (15 passenger)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Vancouver WA
    Posts
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    There are people spending $100,000 on mastercrafts! ba-dum-tish

    Sorry, thats all I got.

    BTW pelican tastes a lot like spotted owl.


    PWI as usual...

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    Henderson, NV
    Posts
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    Default

    just for you newty:

    A man is defending himself at trial after having been caught by a game warden just as he blew a Spotted Owl into a flurry of feathers.

    After reading the charges, the judge, well known for his environmental sympathies, gravely announced that since the species concerned is in danger of imminent extinction, he would have to make an example out of the defendant.

    The man, waxing eloquent, said he was very sorry for what he'd done, but that he was totally destitute and needed the bird to need his hungry children. All he had to his name, he said, his coice cracking with emotion, was the little bit of bird shot he had left in his gun.

    The judge took off his glasses to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye, and after regaining his composure, told the defendant he would let him go with a warning this time.

    The man beamed with pride as he started out of the courtroom.

    Just then, the judge called out, "Oh, by the way, what does a Spotted Owl taste like?"

    The man's face came alive as he turned around and said, "Your honor, it's hard to describe. Sort of a cross between a Bald Eagle, a Whopping Crane and a California Condor."
    '06 Supra Launch 20SSV-gone but never forgotten

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Lake Village, AR
    Posts
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    Default

    *Biology Class - final exam.*

    Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk,' worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages. He wrote:

    1.) It is perfect formula for the child.
    2.) It provides immunity against several diseases.
    3.) It is always the right temperature.
    4.) It is inexpensive.
    5.) It bonds the child to mother, and vice versa.
    6.) It is always available as needed.

    And then, the student was stuck. Finally, in desperation, just before the bell indicating the end of the test rang, he wrote...

    7.) It comes in 2 cute containers.

    He got an A.
    07 Mobius LS--Razorback Red

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Between Baton Rouge & New Orleans, LA
    Posts
    83

    Default joke of the day

    les miles, the head football coach for lsu.
    '08 OBV-gravity III with two 550 lb & one 400 lb, 3 pair of Kicker KM613 cabin speakers, Kicker KM10 sub, one set KM6500.2 HLCD tower speakers, Kicker ZXM700.5 amp, Kicker ZX450.2 & Kenwood KMR-440U head unit

  8. #8
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    Jun 2007
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    Posts
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by flex View Post
    les miles, the head football coach for lsu.
    Thank goodness he's yall's joke. Arkansas sent theirs to Ole Miss.
    07 Mobius LS--Razorback Red

  9. #9
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    Jun 2009
    Location
    Between Baton Rouge & New Orleans, LA
    Posts
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    Default

    that's a good joke too! tiger fans would do anything for petrino now.
    '08 OBV-gravity III with two 550 lb & one 400 lb, 3 pair of Kicker KM613 cabin speakers, Kicker KM10 sub, one set KM6500.2 HLCD tower speakers, Kicker ZXM700.5 amp, Kicker ZX450.2 & Kenwood KMR-440U head unit

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Springfield Missouri
    Posts
    3,391

    Default Proverbs by Larry The Cable Guy

    1. A day without sunshine is like night.

    2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

    3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

    4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

    5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

    6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

    7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

    8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

    9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture most people have.

    10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

    11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

    12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

    13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

    14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

    15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

    16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

    17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

    18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

    20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?

    21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, 'What the heck happened?'

    22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

    23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

    24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
    1998 Mobius
    310 HP PCM
    SOLD

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